I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
