We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
