Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
