hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize