can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
