Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
