so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
