Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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