Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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