no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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