I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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