i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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