Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Randomize
