So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I want to fling myself into the sun
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
