My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
