Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
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