you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize