i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
only if we run a train.
done.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
