okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
