So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
