yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
