Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
