Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
