trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
