...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
