So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Randomize