Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
