So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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