She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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