I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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