I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
