Yo dont text me then not text me
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
They took my balls.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
