Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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