My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
