she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
