At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
