"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
