Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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