Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
