Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
