sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
