I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
