Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
