Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
