i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
