We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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