piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
