I'm drive I can fine osifer
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
