I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
