Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
